It is not such a small world after all...

I love to eat! 

There I said it. The root of my problems is food (and the fact that I am just not all that into exercise and being sweaty). Not just any food either. The fattiest of foods that you can find are the ones I love. Lets be honest here; EVERYONE loves those foods. Even if you are the healthiest person alive and eat nothing but lettuce, you still dream about that triple chocolate cake you saw in the bakery window last week.

This small world sees me as an obese or fat person. While everyone struggles with body image at some point in life, I have always struggled with mine. I was not a fat baby, in fact I want to believe that I was the cutest damn baby that anyone had seen in a while (while I still tell myself that from time to time, my family seems to disagree). The whole fat kid thing hit me around age 6. Looking back through pictures, I seem to just make a slow progression to Fatdom. 

Elementary school was easy, no one cared if you were fat. All those kids cared about was if you stole their scented marker or took their place as line leader. Ahh, life was easy back then! Then we hit middle school. The dreaded place were they coop up all the kids who hit puberty with all the kids who are still trying to live without their scented markers. Middle school is where most kids move on from Fatdom. Not me. I prospered in it, bought land in it, even became a Queen of it. But hey, it still was not that bad. Then comes High School. The place where freshmen think they have to show off how bad ass they are and the seniors just count down the days until graduation. This place was my living hell. The amount of teasing and hurtful things that were said to me was ridiculous. Here are some examples: 

• One person told me I had a butt in the front.
• They told me I made the portables shake when I walked. 
• Senior year I had someone put Cheetos in my gas tank, and write "I love Fat People" on the  back of my car. 

Think about what that does to a person who already has low self esteem and body image problems. But hey, I graduated and met some friends that I had great times with. I actually met the friend that will be stuck with me for life (Sorry 'bout it!). While it was living hell, I made it through alive like most people. But I still lived in Fatdom. I moved on to college: the land of the unknown, the freaks, and the sterotypical Greeks. But this is the place that I learned to be okay with living in Fatdom. I even joined a sorority. Who would have thought a person living in Fatdom, would get into a sorority? It was the place that I found out that it was okay to be fat, you will find friends that will love you for you. Hell, I found 54 that love me for all my quirks. 

So while I still live in Fatdom, I have learned to love and accept it fully. I will always be fat, and I am okay with that. 

If you have made it this far, I thank you. Sorry I had to delve into my life as a fat kid, but I felt it was relevant to the whole "Why I am writing this blog" story. I decided to begin this blog adventure to finally tell people that it is okay to be big (and finally realize that myself). So this will be a blog about a Big Girl hashing it out in the Small World we live in. Welcome to Fatdom everyone! 

Carry on, 

The Big Girl